2000-04-28 | 04:16:24

My mind clambers around it's walls. I'm trying to remain cool, calm, and in control. I think I'm failing miserably.

He just needs to seriously leave me alone. Stop with the verbal and physical harassement. I can't take it and I don't need to. Babydoll is out to kill him but then again I don't care anymore. I just want him gone, far far far away. Hopefully to a land I've never heard of. I'm hoping now that I've decided he will taper off and leave me be. I can't and won't deal with his torture anymore.

I drank way too much on Tuesday. I shouldn't have. I seldom do and on Tuesday I broke that rule and consumed as much as I could. I was amazed I could still function coherantly. But they took care of me. They put me in a cab and headed me home so I could slip into jammies and not open a wink of my eye till the sun filtered through the blinds.

I shouldn't cry. I really shouldn't. It brings out a whole new batch of things I'm just not ready to deal with. And yet there I was, locked up in the last stall and sobbing like a baby. Some days I just wish I never got out of bed.



p r e v i o u s // n e x t