2002-01-21 | 1:29 p.m.

I haven�t been able to update. My computer crashed big time. It�s sitting in my room opened up like a body cavity with it�s organs displayed. Everything has been deleted of its hard drive. Which means that anything I had in there is lost, gone, say bye-bye. There isn�t a chance at all of any of my things to have been retained inside its mind. Which means I am sad. Sad that the book I cautiously wrote that took me months to write is gone. Sad that all my other words have disappeared into a black bottomless pit. And nothing can be done about it except have my computer rebuilt. My brother and father, in all their computer mastery, couldn�t do anything but take it apart and tell me of its untimely death. But they are rebuilding it and sooner or later I will have it back again. Good as new they both said. Except this time it will be wiped clean like a blank slate. And all those words I took care in writing have gone. All gone. This weighs heavily on my heart and that�s all I�m going to say.

Golden Globes last night? Yeah I didn�t give a fuck about them. While I might have watched them before and chuckled at some outfits I just thought it pointless now. Much like any award ceremony that has happened after September 11th. Who the fuck cares about who wins what type of award when the world is in disarray? Honestly right now the world still seems to be chaotic and I don�t think getting back to normal means tuning in to see media fabrications win awards for nothing. I was so annoyed that I just switched channels quickly. Settled myself in to watch Alias. I would rather watch a young woman kick ass than see pretentious movie and TV personalities flaunt themselves for no apparent reason other than a stupid award that really means bubkiss after all. Then again it�s not like Alias means a damn anyways.

I�m annoyed � can�t you tell? So much so that I�m not even going to the in store today for Tenacious D. I saw JB on SNL and I�m good. I don�t need to be the biggest dork and go to Union Square to see them. Besides I�m sure there will be a shitload of people there. And since I�m still surfing the crimson wave I don�t feel like waiting out in the cold to see the D. Another time.

I don�t know when I�ll be back online. I don�t know when I�ll update again. So see you around.



p r e v i o u s // n e x t