2002-01-10 | 8:42 p.m.

Sometimes things can be so simple. I've never felt this way about anything before, never let anything in so deep inside my heart, and it terrifies me. It also exhilarates me. To be so open and willing for it to come and pounce on me and let me giggle at the consequences. And it's not so much more giggling rather than breathing. It's like I've unloaded the heaviest backpack that I've been carrying around for years.

Life isn't supposed to be easy. It's got it's ups and down's, but sometimes things just happen and your suddenly set free. And it feels good to not be contained. To actually be able to wake up in the morning and realize that maybe life does suck sometimes but I'm the poo and I should take a big whiff. (BIO metaphors - oh how I love thee.)

Granted that MC has lost more than a few screws lately but as I was watching MTV Cribs today (and yes I do watch that show) I have to admit that I was a bit jealous of all that closet space she owns. She's pretty much got a closet for everything from shoes to lingerie to clothes. And while it is a tad excessive I probably will have huge closet spaces when I get rich. (Please my Ab Fab & Karen Walker tendencies are obvious already). Then again I don't have it too bad now since I have 2 closets in my bedroom. They aren't walk in one's but hey I've got a lot of space with them. And yeah Mariah is a little off through out the whole thing with all the "ensemble" changes and her iffy personality up and down. Talk about scary lady. Still she does have some nice closet space.

Looks like Friday night is going to be a lot of people which is always amusing. Some I don't know but the crew of chicks that I know and call my friends are doing the excursion to Brooklyn. Thanks to the Asian contigency of the whole crew dragging us there and promising good times. (Kidding people we always mess with her being the Asian contingency. She laughs just as hard with us.) So yeah sounds promising. I'll probably meet G beforehand in the city because all my friends know how retarded I am when it comes to going to Brooklyn and actually knowing where the fuck I'm supposed to go. Yeah they all know I can be a sever dumbass sometimes. Whatever!

Cooked a dinner tonight for the family and I must say it came out fabulous. I'm seriously thinking of going into cooking as a career. So much so that my mom is all happy if I do and is willing to pay for the classes. Which is awesome since I don't have cash to do so. So I'm looking into that possibility, which is really cool since its turned out to be a secret passion of mine. Yey! And if I do say so myself my dishes aren't that bad. Next week I am attempting a butternut squash dish which I mentioned today and all mouths watered. So yey! I'm excited.

The only crappy thing about today is that I cut my finger with the butcher knife while chopping. I wrapped 3 paper towels around my thumb before the blood finally ceased. Urgh. Not happy. Now it looks like I almost peeled one side of it. Eeek! But it's ok I'm going to bandage the sucker up and hopefully the thumb won't fall off tomorrow. (Joking.)

OK and I'm done. I need to get everything ready for my brother when he comes home after his class so that everything is prepared and he can have the same good meal mom and dad had. I also plan on taking a long hot bath and then later curling up with my book. Yep all about resting tonight. I'm tired and the thumb hurts.

Later...



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