2002-11-28 | 6:05 p.m.

I haven't written in a while. I've been sick and lazy. More sick than lazy.

Tomorrow I leave for Brazil which means today is all about packing for a fun filled week away from this city, people I know, and just generally my life here. I really need this vacation. I am happy to be going. I'm also frightened to be on a plane even knowing full well nothing will happen. It's nerves, nothing I can do about it. Well except drink before the flight so I'm nicely buzzed and can fall asleep soon preventing me from having to be alert and awake for most of the flight (fingers crossed here.)

I'm very happy to be getting out of New York City for a week. Happy that I will be seeing family and friends and hopefully getting some color to my pasty white skin. I need this vacation more than I thought I did. I don't like the way I am here in NYC anymore. It's not the way I look, it's more like the spark inside of me. I've lost it. I hope to find it with some fire from family, friends, and the sea air as I walk the beach boardwalk every morning I am there. I can't wait to be there already!

Today is also thanksgiving day which to me is really just another day. My family and I have never really celebrated it. In fact last year I think we might have even ordered up a pizza for dinner. I suppose if you've never had that tradition set in it's not like you miss it at all. I certainly don't. It is fairly weird to walk around the block I live in now (which is a busy midtown block) and not have anyone walking out and about and having all the stores closed up. Trippy even.

I need to get back to packing since I really haven't done that all day. I've been sleeping on and off and just reading and doing nothing I should have been doing. And now it's 6 in the evening and I have nothing to show for my day. I should have been packed by now. But I'm not because I'm an ass clown and a total slacker. Ha! Anyways I probably won't be updating for a week because I won't want to be sitting in front of a computer on my vacation time. I'll update again when my ass is back in NYC. Till then!



p r e v i o u s // n e x t