2003-12-20 | 5:07 p.m.

I'm so bored with life in general right now. Nothing seems to be going right. Nothing seems to be fair. And I just feel as if I am stuck in a bad ride that I can't get off from.

Christmas is next week and honestly it feels like it's 3 weeks away. It's not that I'm a bad holiday mood. I'm not. I even found myself humming to John Lennon's "So This Is Christmas" in a friends car. And yet it feels as if time has literally flown since I've last been laid off.

I know that I'm not happy. I know that I am working on changing things. It's just incredibly frustrating to know that things are beyond my control right now.

My brother took us to celebrate my mom and dad's 32nd wedding anniversary this past week. He took us out to La Caravel and made sure to pay and make it this big thing and blahblahblah. Yeah if I had a spare $500 I would have paid for the meal too. Urgh. I know he does it out of love but sometimes I just want to slap him.

Went out to Lit last night and suffered horribly today. It also doesn't help that I get home at like 6am and have to be somewhere at 10am. I was not a happy camper this morning at all! But I did get back with a lovely new haircut and my hair looks oh so pretty and flat as they flat ironed the sucker down. I was supposed to be going to see a friends band play at the Knitting Factory right now but I doubt that's going to happen. Only because I don't want to waste my money and also because I'm not feeling so hot still. Better to stay put for the night and get to bed early.

This post is just mindless rambling. I've become completely boring. Such is life.



p r e v i o u s // n e x t